For the past few days I have been thinking on what to buy using my first and now my second paycheck combined. Couldn't decide on what to buy when I got my 1st paycheck coz I was busy with work and decided to wait for my range of options to get bigger. Now that I have received my 2nd paycheck, my available resources have grown larger and so too are the available options for spending. The problem is, I still can't make up my mind on what to buy!!

It's not like I am kedekut; I am a big spender and won't mind paying RM 15 for a large ice-blended at Starbucks, spend RM 100 or more for dinner in a restaurant or anything that has got to do with food. It's the non-edible stuff that I have problem deciding on what to get.

Among the stuff I am thinking on buying are:

1) Xbox 360 : The console itself cost RM 1500, games another RM 160, so I would spend about RM 2000 just to get the console and with a small selection of games. The problem is that it will only have about 2-3 games to play and my interest to play 360 has waned since I came back coz playing an RTS on my pc is more enjoyable (Blame Dawn on War on this). Also, my resources will be strech thin if I make this purchase, and I highly doubt I can buy the stuff I liked to eat :(

2) Warhammer 40k : Since I am hooked to Dawn of War is no surprised that I want to try out the original table -top game from which the RTS games is derived from. The cost of setting up and army is also as expensive as the 360, but can be spread out over a few months as the army takes time for it to be fully battle ready and fully painted. Like the first month I can spend RM 500 for the rule book (I know, buying the RM 250 rule book is insane) and the Land raider. Then next month I buy a tactical squad for another RM 500 and so on. Really liked the idea of getting the land raider, but my CBT gladiator is still in pieces and unpainted and as soon as the land raider is finished I highly doubt I will want to get the marines. After all, all I want is the land raider sculpt. Also, I even said to my self, why stop playing a minitures game (because it is too expensive) to play another minitures game (which is also very expensive) ? Still deciding on whether to pick up the hobby, but to tell the truth, prefer playing computer :P

3) PSP : It was this same time last year I wanted a PSP. The price has dropped, more games available, but it still cost a bomb just to get started. Add to the fact I need to buy the sony memory stick duo which is only compatible with the PSP itself, no thanks.

4) Nintendo DS : I would have bought one last year if I wanted to.

5) New graphics card : Unfortunetly because my computer is prefer ancient by todays standards, I need to spend about RM 3000 just to get a new mother board, ram and processor to run the graphic card I want to buy. Also not many new interesting games to justify an upgrade and my laptop still do fine. (To my DOTA friends out there, DOTA is not my cup of tea)

6) New handphone : nope, my current one will do me fine

7) New car : my current car is still ok, no need for a new one

8) New watch : my current one is fine

As you can see, I do not have many needs or wants on my part to justify spending on any of those above. Maybe next month when I have more dough I will buy something, but in the mean time I am still keeping my non-edible wants on hold. Very thrifty I am right?

My previous week was one hectic one. Had a site meeting on Monday in which I have to drive there and also had to stay at office until 8pm on Friday to make sure the construction frawing of one project is printed out. It's not a small drawing mind you, it is a detailed drawing printed on a big plotter which prints on A1 size paper. And the mechanical drawings is lot because there are alot of different services for the building. Anyway managed to get through the week ok. Pretty rushed though..

Just now went to the wine shop beside Maybank in SS15 to have a look. Saw a lot of Australian wines, but none of the brands I am familier with. There's a lot of Shiraz, Cabernet Souvignon etc, but we somehow the wines I drank last time when I was in Australia are either rare or cannot be found. I saw there is a bottle of Old Vine Shiraz of another brand which costs almost RM 200!! Before I left Australia I bought and drank a bottle of Old Vine Shiraz from a winery which can only be bought from the celler door for AU60. The wine was very nice with a rich earthly vanillay oak flavour... something like that. Then there is another white wine which is fruity and sweet. It's name is Mcguigan Black Label: Traminar Restling. It is also bought from a winery in Australia (the Barrosa Valley to be exact) and we took it home to drink it during CNY. It costs AU 20. It is so nice that my family wants to drink it again and I am hpoing the local distributer of these wines brought some to M'sia.

I changed my computer abit this week. No more Norton Anti-virus. It bugged me everytime I turn on my computer, everytime to update it and renew its licience. Worst, the message does not pop up the minute your computer boots, but a few minutes after windows loads, so if I already started a program like Dawn of War, the stupid message appears to disturb. And then when you disabled the Auto-protect, it bugs you not stop to turn it back on!! Very bad if you want to squeeze a few Hz out of your computer.

Instead I installed Kaspersky AV. So far so good. It has a 3 month trial to try it. After that must but a 1 or 2 year licience to use it. Atleast it is not as annoying as NAV which BUGS you to update and renew. The 2006 version BUGS you like hell to activate and to update it I'm going to delete it and put Kaspersky instead for my parent's PC. Also it has made their computer slower. Not to mentioned NAV is known for not detecting some stuff when it enters your computer.

On Monday night went for dinner at a Korean BBQ restaurant in Taipan. It is just opposite my former tuition centre and Macdonalds. The food was very nice but the wine was even better!! My face turned red after 3-4 small cups of the wine. Must have drank too fast. The wine has 14% alcohol, quite normal for red wines.

Long weekend

It was a long weekend at the end of the first month of working. Felt very happy that the weekend was finally here as I am looking forward to it he whole week!

Anyway, on Satrurday morning I woke up early coz the family mechanic need to come to my house to replace the falt battery in my car. The battery ran flat due to a malfunction of the timer switch that controls the "ring of light" around the key entry. So the "ring of light" drained my car battery till it ran flat. Alarm don't work. Starter not a squek. 100% dead. Fortunately all it needs was a battery change and the car was good to go. Too bad I can't have the "ring of light" anymore. Looks very cool at night.

Then in the afternoon although my car was repaired, my friend picked me up to go play MW. He fianlly got a dropship of his own and has the chance to be dropship command. The battle on Sat between us ended after we called it off due to lack of time and nearing a stallmate. But Arnis managed to hold down 1 assault mech and a group of infantry while my artillery and the rest of my forces move in for the kill. Too bad Arnis was sacrificed in the process.

On Sunday went to Cheng Beng at the Nirvana near Semenyih. Nothing to talk about since it was a yearly routine.

Almost a month

I had worked almost a month now. Just one more week to mark the first month of working. Tomolo not going to play MW as everyone else has some work to do. Good for me though, get to zzzzzzz for the week ahead. For someone who likes to take naps and sleep long hours working the whole day is very tiring... and my office maintain a 5 day week with normal work hours somemore! (too expensive and not that productive to work on Sat).

Dunno why I want suddenly thinking to buy a land raider sculpt for display when my CBT gladiator is still in pieces inside its plastic blister. Must atleast get that mech walking b4 I decide to get anymore "dust-gatherers". Maybe it is because I pass by Amcorp mall everyday to and from work that I should check out Wolf's place.

Haih, nowawdays also not many ppl online to chat with. Even when they are online, there are away or busy.. must be a busy time for everyone (including me!)

3 Weeks of working

By now I have already worked for 3 weeks. Nothing much is going on yet, as no projects has been assigned to me. Still, the day goes by very slowly when you have nothing to do.

The funny thing is, when you have no work, you will be begging for work. When you DO get work after begging for it, you wish that particular work you wished for was not given to you! Funny how humans behave.

Had a fun weekend playing MW. Managed to beat 2 opponents by my superior force (and also alot of luck, as my friend will explain.. ). A fun game to say the least. Also in every game there will reach a point you and opponent will neither move forward as both of you will know what will happen next. It's like " You go first!!" "no you go first" " your force is superior than mine, you go first:P ".

Weekends here!!

Whoooppee.. the weekend is here. Can sleep a bit later and get mroe sleep than usual. Dunno if there is MW on saturday, hope more ppl will come so that I can slaughter any noobs who dare challenge me :P

Anyway, I was wondering how does ppl play Dawn of War against 2-3 insane computers and still WIN. I know it will take a long time but usually I get slaughtered before the hour is up. How do these guys do it???!??

Of course they dun cheat coz defeating 2-3 insane computers with cheats is very easy.

Working already

That's right, my first day of work was on the 1st of March. The job: Mechanical Consultant Engineer. Office: In the heart of Kuala Lumpur, near the Bank Bumi building. Type of work: M & E Building services consulting such as air-con, firefighting, sanitation, cold water plumbing.

So far oklah the company. Getting there is easy since can tumpang my dad's transport and take the Putra LRT to the Jamek Mosque LRT station. If required drive and park at the Putra LRT station. Then a short walk to the office building and go up to the office by lift. Have not updated this blog much since when I come back from work a little to tired to do anything.

Happy Valentine's Day

Since I am single and can't celebrate it with that special someone, I made this cartoon for fun
















That's right, cupid ought to be more up to date with the latest hardware and invest in an AWP or the like. This is to improve accuracy which in turn will reduce any chance of wrong pairings and the .50 caliber bullets will make even the most stubborn person to fall in love. If only cupid DID upgrade to such a weapon..

One.. more... turn....

Recently I have been staying up late playing the lastest game I installed in my computer; Civilization IV. Somehow I am still totally lost in managing my cities as my cities just refuse to grow and even lost to some barbarians wandering around the land... on the easiest difficulty. Like last night, started playing at around 10-11 pm, all the way to 4 in the morning! Almost won the Alpha Centauri victory condition. Those space parts took forever to build.

Once I played on the deity difficulty, my opponents all hate me and looks like they cheated by producing everything in double quick time. Needless to say I was crushed :P

Home computer formated

TYhis is a post using my now "brainwashed" home computer. I have to format it coz it was beginning to lag like a snail and Internet explorer is unusable because it keeps having pop-ups and other unessary toolbars on it.

From the software I installed so far, I think I am leaning to open source software then expensive commercial software. I installed mozilla thunderbird instead of M'soft outlook, firefox instead of IE, winamp instead of WMP, Openoffice instead of MS office and Foxit Reader instead of Adobe... what is the Adobe's PDF reader again? .. Ya, Acrobat. Try it, Foxit Reader is WAAAYYY better.

Right now looking for ads about jobs in the newspaper. Applied to some, with little response from any so far. Hopefully after new year things gets better.

Wifi problem

Right now the only way I can surf using my laptop is using the home wifi. It is provided by a router with an in-built modem that supports wifi and up to 4 Lan ports. So far the modem is very good as it can connect to internet easily and is xbox live friendly (as in no need to do advanced settings to connect).

The problem now is... WHY THE HECK THE SIGNAL KEEP DROPPING OUT FOR NO PARTICULAR REASON???!?! Definetely not the walls since it is quite near the router. I think could be the internet connection, if it drops, so does the wifi signal. Or maybe after I set the WEP (wireless encrpytion) the problem occured. Or maybe because my brother downloads stuff like crazy. But late at night when I am surfing and my brother is asleep no problem with the line.

This problem annoys me since it is very bad to talk via msn. Send 1 msg, disconnect and then you have to send again since the person you msg thought you disconnect. Then when the person wants to send msg, you disconnect and he/she can't send the msg. Unlike ICQ msn can't send pm when the receiver is offline. GRRRR...

2k5 in review

Since my brother made a post reviewing his life (any better word to say it ? :P) in the year 2005, I not to be outdone decide to post about myself what I did in the year 2005.

The first part of 2005 (and the month before it, Dec 2k4) was the first time I ever work to earn money and most importantly experience in the real world. I did practical training in a factory in Shah Alam as part of the requirement of my degree where I took the role as a trainee engineer. Basically my job was to ensure the production line is running smoothly and to save manpower and production cost as much as possible. But the most important thing bout working is getting along with ppl and getting the job done as soon as ppl and learn how to handle things without any guidance at all. Still remember vividly the person I'm under saying that I got to figure out what to do for myself and not simply wait and listen for instructions. Other things are pretty minor like braving the traffic to work, leaving home early and coming back home late (well, not very late) and finding out just how hard to support the type of lifestyle I'm without relying on my walking banks (hint: they raise me).

2k5 also marked the final year of my degree. Very time consuming and laborious work to complete the final year project of my degree. Late nights, working long hours during holidays, big arguments with project mates, supervisor oveaseas for half a year, been there done that. But it was done finally and with good grade to boot. The seminar went well, the exhibition went well and the final report was printed and send to Finland (where our supervisor was at the time) safely to be graded.

During my final year I fallen in love yet again after I first did 4 years ago when I was in Form 5. Four years is a long time to forget and get on with chasing another girl. Fortunately, I had more success this time as I managed to to kept in contact with her compared to last time where I totally forgotten to take note of her contact number. This time I tried not to repeat the mistakes that cost me dearly last time. But still, I still managed to screw up half way when things were looking good. Thanks to the advice of some friends, I finally learn what I should not have done. The good news is that I did went out with her once after my debacle...

I travelled more around Australia in 2005. Went with my friends in a rented car and did day trips to locations around Adelaide. The first day we went to Barrosa valley where I ended up with 2 bottles of sprakling juice, 1 bottle of red wine and 2 bottles of liquor. Second day went to Murray bridge and visited the Murraylands. Third day drove all the way to Port Augusta. Then during the semester break in semester 2, we went to Uluru on a backpacking trip. First time slept under the stars, literally. Fallen in love with a Korean girl on the Uluru trip but found out she was not single, priceless.

Back home in M'sian already

I am now back homw in M'sia already. The flight was 7 hours ++, with a lot of turbulence :(

Doing practically nothing at the moment except relaxing or playing. Right now I have retired from being a student to become an engineering graduate (unless I decided to do post-grad work, which is very unlikely). Have not look for a job yet, maybe soon next year.

Back from Melbourne :P

Just came back from Melbourne after leaving the city on the 22nd. Spent a night in Horsham b4 continuing on. The distance between Melbourne and Adelaide is 700 km+++!! Luckily my father was driving and I was the navigator :P but guiding my dad to Mount Gambier > Warrnambool > Great Ocean Road > Melbourne > Philip Island (Pengiuns!!!) > Melbourne > Horsham > back to Adelaide isn't easy though.

The first picture shows the kangaroo I bought from Melbourne and the penguin I bought from Penguin.. sorry, Philip Island. The second picture is the graduation bear which I bought during my graduation :P

More pictures and posts soon :)

Getting ready for graduation...

Went out to settle a few things like the academic transcript and the graduation gown. The academic transcript have to PAY just to get a printout of it. Compared to Inti they will give you the first one free. Anyway have to wait till middle of next year to get it since by then my transcript will have a line saying "I graduate with so and so degree". Hope it reaches my home :P

The graduation gown was a slight hassle though. Walked all the way to Carrington Street to book the gown from a shop, but the shop ran out of gowns :( . So have to walk all the way back to university to book the gown from the university. Oklah the price, AU 55. But unlike the shop outside we must return it really really soon after the graduation ceremony, which leave little time for photo shots.

I have been planning the trip for my parents the past few weeks. The accomodation to Melbourne and back is settled. The one day trips to various points of interests have also been planned. Now have to cross fingers and know my way around since I am the one which is going to guide my parents around Australia.

Oh, and here's a photo of the lamp-post in front of my hostel which was knocked by some vehicles. I assume it must be a car since anything heavier will bring down the entire pole. Came back from settling everything only to find the entire street out of power :( Which means I must walk all the way up and all the way down :( The response was very quick. Six hours after I took this photo, around 9pm the pole is replaced and power is restored. Luckily for those guys working on the pole, it is only by 9 oclock that it is actually dark.

Christmas Season :)

I went to Victoria Square to watch the lighting of the Christmas tree there. Immediately after the Christmas tree is lit then saw a fireworks display. A little afriad of the fireworks (blame it on my phobia of fireworks or things that blow up) at first, but then it turn out OK. As you can see, the Christmas tree is quite tall and very very bright. There's another Christmas tree in the background on the Santos tower.

Next week is going to be the last week I will be staying alone since my parents will come on the 10th of December. I will follow them back to M'sia after that before the year is over. Well, better enjoy the freedom while it lasts!

Went shopping :)

Yesterday I went to Marion Shopping Center in the southwest part of Adelaide. Took the usual bus to the city and then another bus down south. The place is very far but atleast I have been to that part of Adelaide. Lepak for a few hours there, mostly looking at games and toys :P

The shopping complex is like Alamanda in Putrajaya, where the carpark is adjacent to the shopping area. It has only 2 stories, but house all the big retailers like Myer, Davond Jone, Harref Scarf, hypermaket retailers like Target, K-mart, Big-W amd supermarket like Coles and Woolworths; all under 1 roof! Funny thing is that Coles is on the 2nd floor while Woolworths is on the first floor and not next to eaxh other.

Oh, suprisingly there are no Christmas carols jiggling away at max volume. Most probably the ppl here grew tired of it after sooo long. Or maybe too early for Christmas. Then again there is a Santa Claus where kids can sit on his lap with a X'mas tree behind him.

So did I bought anything? Well I bought the map of Victoria and Melbourne. Then a "toy" for myself. It is a Lego arc fighter with movable S-foils. Call me a little kid or whatever, but I rather spend AU 70 on this than on Xbox or PC games when I have not fully played those games. I always wanted a model in my room, first it was the land raider, then a basalisk, a mech, then I prefer something that can withstand a lot of punishment and can be diassembled for the trip home.

In fact, thinking back about all the lego toys I have, I actually have ALOT of them. Most of the biggies are from the 1980s and early 1990s. Went to ebay and the net to look up, and gosh, I was surprised at the quality of legos in those days. Compared to this ARC fighter the box has so much air I wonder what the heck was Lego thinking. No wonder Lego is reporting losses.

Sadly the majority of pieces are either loss or mixed up with some other sets. hopefully if I keep this model intact and as a MODEL, it should remain intact.

Here are some Lego sets which I USED to have them in 1 piece.

Yellow roof house with caravan
http://www.brickset.com/search.aspx?Set=1472-1

Bank with armored van that can "secure" the safe
http://www.brickset.com/search.aspx?Set=1490-1

Fire truck with retractable ladder
http://www.brickset.com/search.aspx?Set=6358-1

Airport, where now I only have 3 out of 4 jet engines, still have the dish and the odd shape control tower glass
http://www.brickset.com/search.aspx?Set=6392-1

Parking garage with gas station and car wash!!! my best set ever!!!
http://www.brickset.com/search.aspx?Set=6394-1

Police truck with sirens and sound
http://www.brickset.com/search.aspx?Set=6450-1

Ultralight plane. Looks very familier
http://www.brickset.com/search.aspx?Set=6529-1

Sports car with bike trailer..still remember the car and trailer
http://www.brickset.com/search.aspx?Set=6644-1

Dumpster
http://www.brickset.com/search.aspx?Set=6652-1

4X4 with suspension (so far I have never seen this type of suspension anymore)
http://www.brickset.com/search.aspx?Set=6672-1

Utility repair lift (the wonders of lego)
http://www.brickset.com/search.aspx?Set=6671-1

Tow truck , recognized it by the red pulley with the highway logo
http://www.brickset.com/search.aspx?Set=6674-1

Shell tanker. I remember having a shell tanker, but not sure if it was this though
http://www.brickset.com/search.aspx?Set=6695-1

Fishing Boat. An actual boat that actually FLOATS!!!
http://www.brickset.com/search.aspx?Set=4011-1

Coast guard boat with deployable dinghy. One day I saw on TV a coast guard boat which can deploy a dinghy just like this boat and I instantly remember about this set.
http://www.brickset.com/search.aspx?Set=6353-1

Some M:tron space sets with luminous panels and attennas :P
http://www.brickset.com/search.aspx?Set=6833-1
http://www.brickset.com/search.aspx?Set=6877-1

I think I just stopped for now... AS you can see, this is only legos which I still can remember.. there are many many more other toys as well...

No mood to play games :( & Emotional rollacoaster :(

Now that all the exams and projects are over, I find it funny that I have no mood at all to play my Xbox and PC. The game I rented from the online renting website sits there unused. Dawn of War and Serious Sam 2 discs remain in thier colorful original case. Battlefield 2 too lazy to play. If the game is a little bit too hard I give up on it. I now have all the time in the world to actually play these games and I am not using that time for that purpose. Funny how the human mind relaxes itself? Most propably there isn't any hard work to balance out the need to play. There is a saying; Work hard play hard. Now I understand since now I am not working at all so that's why I am not playing at all.

My feelings have been through a very rough ride this few days. First it was the "jumped the gun" action I did (read previous blog entry), then I totally ruined any opportunity to atleast try to fix things right on Saturday night. Haih, if only I can turn back the clock to set things straight.. :(

Right now I am still in the cooldown period, trying to overcome what I have done wrong and trying to set my mind up to look ahead but still remember to prevent such a mistake. Its very hurting to know you have been rejected, but atleast it will be less hurting to know it upfront than the girl keeping you in the dark (courtesy of my first love). Also, in both instances we din even move pass the "gf&bf" part or the dating part even. I don't know why, but it seems like my relationship is broken before it even begins. Not to say it is bad though, since maybe there is still time to restart and give a second chance... well maybe, after the cool down period and going through the process more carefully this time.

Where should I begin my love story part 2?

I know her for quite a while already since I first came to Adelaide. She is in the same course as me and is a close friend to one my coursemates. During my 1st year in Adelaide where I was doing my 3rd year of my degree, I was still thinking and hoping to meet up with my 1st love although I got no idea where she is or whether she is even married even. I was also too busy at that time since it was first time overseas alone and trying to be able to cope with the new environment and workload.

It wasn't until the beginning of Semester 2 2005 that I somehow finally gave up my first love for good (maybe it was turning 21, maybe something activated in my brain somewhere). Also, during the practical training I did while I was in Malaysia I chatted with fresh graduate from US who started work the same time as me. He was already on the path to becoming a husband, as 2 months later he went to NRD and approve his marriage. Is that fast or what?

Not trying to break his record for his speed to marry, but as we chatted he said that actually the best time to get a gf is when you are studying. When you are working already, you are working no day no night and you rarely have a chance to meet up with ppl. No free leisure time to meet up with friends. The environment is more stressful than during studying. As I did my practical training, what he said all made sense. All I did was work and work. When you return home you are too sleepy for anything. Also when you start working everyone is busy. How to find a soulmate then? At that time I din really have a big social circle either, which further contribute to the problem.

After my practical training, I returned to Adelaide to continue and complete my degree. What he said still remained in my mind. I was thinking, since this is my last year I will be studying, I might as well atleast do something I can't or may not have time to do after I graduate.

I didn't tackle her in the first Semester because I was too busy with project and stuff. Also at that time I though she has a boyfriend already.

As the 2nd semester began I realized that she was actually single and from the looks of it available. Seeing an opportunity I cannot resist, I proceede to get to know her better. As I get to know her better, the more I began to like her even more. She might not be as beautiful as a supermodel or some friends I know, but she is hardworking, friendly and has the right attitude. One thing I know, having a supermodel type gf with a bad attitude is not good. Like having a Ferrari which requires $$$$ of matainance (but if you can tahan that, go ahead).

But still, I was not confident if I could kau her properly. I was still outside her circle of friends, I lacked any way to converse in my mother tougue and new a relative newbie to this kind of things. What to talk to her? How to approach her without frightening her.

All that change after that day at Uluru. That day, my friends went up the Rock but I decided against it coz it beyond my capabilities and feel guilty to climb up. Instead I walked around the Rock (9.4km!!!) with a Korean girl, who was also on our trip and also decided not to climb. We chatted as we walk around the rock, getting to know each other better. The next few days both of us were confortable chatting with each other and exchanged each others contacts. Too bad she already has a boy friend and her friend is too old (looks like she is 21 but actually 27!) and on her way.

Even so, that trip make me realized something; Given the appropriate setting, timing and the right person I am actually able to court a girl (I may sound like an absolute loser, but hey, atleast I tried and succeded in a way). All it needs is the confidence to go for it. That final 10% in any F1 team strategy, where 50% is the car, 40% is the team and 10% is the driver.

As the days go by I managed to find some opportunity to chat with her. I also did the most important thing I WILL NOT FORGET AGAIN, I asked for her contact number. Also as the days go by my feeling for her has risen to the point where I just wish she was already taken to ease the huge feeling for her. Fortunately I managed to control my feelings and placed her as a secondary priority for a while and set more important stuff like project report as the main priority. At this time I wonder she even know I like her or not.

The moment of truth, or the climax moment is when I finally tell her I liked her. I don't know why it just had to be after an exam, but I just had to tell her I liked her. That exam was my FINAL exam for my entire degree, and chances of seeing her again is very very slim. My desire to tell her such is so heavy I could control it no longer. I had the fear that history will repeat itself again, as last time after the FINAL exam of SPM, my first love went home early and dissappeared.

Fortunately, it all worked out well and I did tell her I liked her face to face after following her back that day. It was a great moment of relief at that time, finally telling her why I like to chat with her. After confessing to her, she replied that she already knew that I liked her. Never felt so happy in a very long while.

However, as fate would have it, whenever there is a climax, there will be the period of whether it will turn out good or turn out bad. The following days after that showed great sign that things were badly going downhill. First, one day I decided go to university to take out some files stored in the CATS computer. After I took the files out, I decided to see if she was around in the CATS. I don't know what happen that day, but I just didn't see her. I spotted her friend, but it never occured to me that she is around. It was later that night in MSN that she said she was actually in CATS at that time. why I didn't see her? why I didn't talk to her friend?..

Also as the days go by, from the voice in her calls seem to be getting more stress. The first time I called her I can hear laughter in her voice. The second time I called her she is still quite ok, but I can sense she is a bit stress. The third time I call her, that fateful call that started the chain reaction, I can really sense she was under alot of stress. I should have known that was a danger sign. That was the sign things were about to implode. That was the sign to let her cool down for a while... that was the sign not to mentioned those fateful words...

After that she never answered my calls to her. I knew at that very time she is free, but she never returned my calls. I immediately had a sense of deja vu at that time, remembering what happened four years ago. So while eating humble pie I called my friend to tell him my problem. I usually don't like to consult ppl when it comes to relationships, but I had no other way. I did something wrong and I really need to do damage control.

After talking with him for a while, I finally knew what went wrong. The timing was way off. I jumped the gun. In the end he said that she MIGHT come to the gathering on Saturday night and ask me if I would come. I decided to go, but held that feeling she will not be there.

To be continued.... gosh, so many things to write, plus the dilemma of what to add or what not to add..

Love is in the air..

I don't know why, or such sheer coincidence, but there are two very sweet love letters pop up at the same time. I went to view Hui Ling's site and here I see a love letter dedicated to her boyfriend. Move over to my brother's blog (Ji Yung's blog), and ....WALAUEHHH.. a message beyond my capabilities ever! Is the 16th of November bring any significance whatsoever? I don't know.

What I do know is that the day before (15th) in a telephone call to a girl I spoke those three magic words to her. Then the next day (16th) I called her many times but she has not answered me yet :( . Ask my friend my problem and turns out I jumped the gun on the whole "I love you thing". See, apparently the situation wasn't prefect to say those 3 magic words.... Now I know why the first girl I tried to kau did not work out :(


I think she is still stress out since her exams have recently ended. Add in that "shocker" I think she just needs time to recover and her mood stabilized. Just hope it is not too late or the damage is permanent :(